Yes, I'm still here. Wanting to blog but not really having anything to say. I don't like that feeling although I know a lot of bloggers feel that way from time to time. I haven't had a good month. It's been one of the hardest months on record (EVER!) for me. And to be honest, I am really, really down. I know that time will make me feel better so I'm doing my best to soak up the life that I have even though it's not very pretty at the moment. I think that's one of those things that you learn by getting older (and surviving really awful post-partum depression). You know the difference between true depression and just a natural, healthy FUNK. Well, this is a natural healthy funk. On life's roller coaster ride, I'm on a very long uphill climb. I'm holding on tight, trying to enjoy the view as I climb and doing my best to get through each day. I know that, given time, the exhilarating downhill slide will come. Hopefully, in the meantime, I'm gaining more character and building strength. Not every day in life can be great, beautiful, fun, light, happy, warm, enveloping. I notice as I age, these down moments (which, thankfully, are quite rare) make me appreciate the good ones all the more. Even in the midst of my sadness, knowing that brings relief to my heart.
One of the things that makes me feel better is this photo. My two girls. The very human one who just happens to own my heart and the furry one who captivates my soul. I am so thankful for this photo.....
So, as I travel through this deep valley, I'll continue to latch on to those very small things (like this photo) that get me through. And I'll continue to dream about and look forward to reaching the next mountain top.
